Abstract
This article analyzes interpersonal communication skills through several real-life cases occurring in both school and community settings.
Drawing on key theoretical perspectives, the study highlights how interpersonal communication involves not only message exchange but also emotional management, empathy, listening, and relationship-building.
The findings indicate that communication problems often arise from dominant or passive interaction styles, unclear messages, lack of assertiveness, and insufficient openness.
In schools, miscommunication during academic collaboration and unmet expectations among peers demonstrate how poor interpersonal skills can hinder teamwork.
In society, conflicts during community service and misunderstandings in public spaces show how aggressive or defensive communication may escalate tensions.
These problems lead to reduced trust, damaged relationships, weakened collaboration, and increased emotional stress.
The article emphasizes that developing assertive communication, active listening, emotional regulation, empathy, and constructive feedback can significantly improve interpersonal interactions.
Overall, the analysis concludes that strong interpersonal communication skills are essential for maintaining harmony, preventing conflict, and fostering cooperative, respectful, and inclusive relationships in both educational and community environments.
Introduction
Interpersonal communication skills are a crucial aspect of communication. According to Manning (2020), interpersonal communication is the interaction between two or more people.
He also explains that interpersonal communication skills are not just about speaking effectively, but also about how a person listens, responds appropriately, and manages relationships in everyday situations.
Interpersonal skills refer to an individual’s ability to communicate effectively, focusing on goals and considering social norms, relationships, and the feelings of others to achieve successful communication (Spitzberg & Cupagh, 2011).
Interpersonal communication skills not only serve as a means of conveying messages but also encompass all aspects of understanding social situations that influence the quality of interpersonal relationships.
In educational and societal contexts, interpersonal skills are crucial because they affect how we communicate, understand context, and influence our ability to collaborate and resolve conflicts.
Interpersonal skills in schools can help students build positive relationships with their peers, boost self-confidence, and support academic success.
Interpersonal skills in society are crucial for creating harmonious relationships and understanding social differences.
This finding aligns with the findings of Beenen et al. (2023), who stated that to understand interpersonal skills, we need to observe how people interact with those around us.
In everyday communication, a lack of understanding of interpersonal skills can lead to misunderstandings and conflict.
A simple example is a communication misunderstanding that occurs between a teacher and a parent.
During report cards, the teacher tells the parent that the child needs to improve his or her focus while studying.
The teacher’s advice is intended to encourage the child to pay more attention to their learning and avoid being easily distracted.
However, the parent has a different understanding. The parent perceives the teacher as criticizing their child for being lazy and having learning difficulties.
Consequently, the parent assumes the teacher has a negative assessment of their child. Therefore, we must understand interpersonal communication skills to avoid misunderstandings in the context of communication.
Therefore, this article will examine cases of interpersonal communication problems occurring in schools and communities.
This study will also discuss the impact of interpersonal communication problems in schools and communities and seek solutions to address these issues.
The Key Concept of Interpersonal Communication Skill
a. Definition of Interpersonal Communication Skill
According to Manning (2020), interpersonal communication is the interaction between two or more people.
He also explains that interpersonal communication skills are not just about speaking effectively, but also about how a person listens, responds appropriately, and manages relationships in everyday situations.
The delivery and exchange of messages between individuals is known as interpersonal communication.
This process can occur in person or through media that allows for two-way interaction. Interpersonal skills include the ability to understand oneself (self-awareness), manage emotions, show empathy, cooperate, and maintain good relationships in various social contexts (Manning, 2020).
Interpersonal skills refer to an individual’s ability to communicate effectively, focusing on goals and considering social norms, relationships, and the feelings of others to achieve successful communication (Spitzberg & Cupagh, 2011).
Interpersonal communication is defined by Beebe et al. (2011) as transactional communication between two or more people, where messages are sent and received simultaneously in an effort to create and discuss meaning and shape relationships.
Furthermore, they explain three important aspects of interpersonal communication. The first is that interpersonal communication is transactional rather than linear.
Communicators not only send messages but also receive them. Second, interpersonal communication is relationship-oriented, where communication not only conveys messages but also builds strong and close relationships.
Each person’s perceptions, experiences, and social environment shape their communication, making it unique and meaningful.
b. Components of Interpersonal Communication Skill
The main components of interpersonal communication are the source, message, channel, sender, receiver, feedback, and noise (Beebe et al., 2011; Praveen, 2017; Tsegaye, 2020).
Understanding each of these components will help you improve the way you communicate with others in interpersonal situations and other contexts.
- The source of a message is the source of the ideas and feelings expressed.
- A message is communication’s written, spoken, and unspoken components to which people assign meaning.
- The channel is used to convey the message to the receiver.
- The sender is the person who initiates communication, creates, and sends the message.
- The receiver is the one who interprets the message and decides whether it was understood and appropriate.
- Feedback is the response to the message.
- Noise is anything that interferes with the message being interpreted as intended.
c. Factors that Influence Interpersonal Communication Skill
According to Tsegaya (2020), there are several factors that can reduce the effectiveness of interpersonal communication; these factors are as follows.
- Cultural influence refers to the customs, language, arts, habits, values, beliefs, and behaviors of a group of individuals. Every country has a different language, making communication difficult.
- Power is the ability to influence others and possess strong self-control. When there is a power imbalance (for example, between seniors and juniors, teachers and students, superiors and subordinates), individuals with lower status may fear making mistakes or being criticized, leading them to remain silent or speak very carefully.
- Gender issues create communication barriers in various ways. There are differences in interpersonal communication between women and men. Women tend to communicate more gently than men.
- Technology is another factor. Communication technologies in the form of email, text messages, and social media updates are currently rapidly increasing. Some of these factors reduce direct interaction in communication.
- Finally, noise is an external factor considered a barrier to effective communication because it creates a gap between the recipient and the communicator. Some examples of physical noise include the sound of operating engines, squealing brakes, and crying children.
The Case Analysis of Interpersonal Communication Skill at School and Society
a. The Case at School
Most of the students spend most time at school. Starting from the morning until the afternoon. They interact with many people from different social backgrounds and ages.
The ways they communicate are literally also different because of many factors. Therefore, undoubtedly, miscommunication and conflict are sometimes unavoidable.
These two cases below are the common cases of interpersonal communication skills at school:
1. Miscommunication among the ‘Cerdas Cermat’ team in preparing for the Competition
In preparation for a ‘Cerdas Cermat’ competition, two students, Farida and Rasya, experienced differing views on learning strategies.
Farida preferred an approach involving intensive practice, while Rasya preferred in-depth conceptual discussions.
This disagreement prevented them from reaching a common understanding, leading Farida to ignore Rasya’s input and determine the direction of the activity alone.
Farida’s actions reflected a dominant and less cooperative interpersonal communication style, while Rasya’s silence indicated a tendency toward passivity.
We consider this approach inappropriate because collaborative work requires openness, not unilateral decisions.
A more assertive and open communication style would support the overall effectiveness of the team.
2. A Friend Who Didn’t Keep His Promise
A student, Khalid, was disappointed because his friend, Surya, had been repeatedly late in submitting the promised study notes.
When they finally met, Khalid expressed his frustration gently and emphasized how punctuality significantly helps him with his studies.
Surya then apologized and explained the reasons for his lateness. This situation reflects Kalid’s assertive interpersonal communication style, and Surya’s response was quite open.
We support this approach because it prevents unnecessary conflict and creates a space for mutual understanding without offending others.
b. The Case at Society
Living in multicultural country is very interesting and fun. We can learn and try to understand many cultural backgrounds and different ways of communication of the people we meet in Society.
However, sometimes we still find some problems and conflicts that are caused by the variety of communication skills. The cases below are the common cases that happen in Society:
1. Less Cohesive Community Service Activities
During a routine community service activity, some residents were seen actively cleaning the gutters, while several young people simply sat and chatted without helping.
An older resident then loudly reprimanded them, blaming them for their perceived lack of environmental concern.
This reprimand offended the young people, who chose to leave, escalating the situation. This interaction demonstrated the older residents’ aggressive communication style, while the young people responded defensively.
We disagree with this approach, as it actually hinders cooperation. A more persuasive and collaborative interpersonal approach would be far more effective in encouraging engagement without embarrassing others.
2. The Queue at the Community Health Center
At a community health center, a woman realized she had been cut off in line by someone else. Instead of reacting angrily, she politely explained that she had arrived early and showed her queue number as proof.
The person who cut off later admitted their mistake, apologized, and returned to their original place.
This incident demonstrates the application of assertive interpersonal communication and the ability to control oneself, thus maintaining one’s dignity while respecting others.
We support this approach because it effectively resolves issues without creating tension or conflict in public spaces.
c. Interpersonal Communication Problems from The Cases above
1. Miscommunication among the ‘Cerdas Cermat’ team in preparing the Competition
The communication problems in this situation primarily relate to incongruent interaction styles, a lack of openness, and weak negotiation skills when making joint decisions.
Farida tends to use a dominant approach, forcing her chosen strategy without allowing Rasya to explain her reasons or offer alternatives.
This results in a one-way communication pattern that ignores the basic interpersonal principle of listening and respecting others’ perspectives.
Conversely, Rasya tends to be passive; she doesn’t express her opinion explicitly even when she disagrees.
This passivity actually increases the potential for misunderstanding because Farida assumes Rasya doesn’t have any objections or doesn’t care much about the group’s decision.
This combination of dominant and passive attitudes leads to communication failure: messages are incompletely conveyed, the needs of each party are not brought to the fore, and a shared understanding is not reached.
Thus, the root of the problem lies in the inability to communicate assertively, that is, to express opinions clearly while remaining open to others’ perspectives. This lack of assertiveness leads to suboptimal collaboration.
2. A Friend Who Didn’t Keep His Promise
In this situation, the interpersonal communication problem stemmed from unmet expectations and delays in conveying information.
Khalid felt aggrieved because Surya failed to fulfil his promise to submit the notes by the agreed time.
However, the potential for a larger conflict could have arisen if Kalid had responded aggressively or blamingly.
Fortunately, Khalid chose an assertive approach, conveying his disappointment clearly, calmly, and focusing on the primary need for punctuality, without attacking Surya personally.
The communication problem that arose was more related to Surya’s uncertainty about commitment and poor time management, which can strain interpersonal relationships if left unchecked.
Suryas’s open and cooperative response helped defuse the tension, but the initial situation still demonstrated that in interpersonal relationships, ineffectively communicated expectations can create friction.
In other words, communication barriers occur when someone fails to honestly explain their limits or capabilities from the outset, resulting in unrealistic promises or commitments.
While assertiveness at the end of the conversation improved the situation, the root of the problem remains the initial lack of communication.
3. Less Cohesive Community Service Activities
The root of the problem in this case stems from the seniors’ aggressive communication style and the youths’ defensive responses.
The high-pitched tone and tendency to blame transformed a message originally intended as a reminder into a personal attack.
This situation created psychological noise in the form of emotional disturbances that prevented the primary message from being objectively received. The youths then reacted defensively, feeling cornered and disrespected, and chose to leave.
This incident demonstrated a lack of empathy, the inability to understand the other party’s perspective, leading to communication devolving into conflict.
Furthermore, the absence of two-way dialogue led to the interaction ending in open tension rather than producing a solution.
Overall, the communication problems stemmed from the absence of a more cooperative interpersonal style, a lack of emotional management skills, and a way of conveying messages that did not adapt to the sensitivities of social relationships within the community.
4. The Queue at The Community Health Centre
The communication problem in this situation arose from the irregularity of the queue and differing perceptions about who should be served first.
This situation can easily escalate into conflict when someone feels their rights are being ignored.
However, the woman who felt cut off in line chose to use an assertive communication approach, calmly expressing her facts and feelings without attacking the other person’s character.
The tension that had arisen subsided because the message was conveyed clearly and did not trigger an emotional reaction.
In fact, the initial communication barrier was more due to a lack of coordination and a lack of attention from the person who cut in, but this can be resolved through effective communication.
In the context of interpersonal relationships, this case demonstrates that minor conflicts in public spaces often stem from differing expectations and accidents, but they can still be managed if one party maintains self-control and conveys the message politely and with respect for others.
d. The Impact on Social Relations at Schools and Society
The insufficient interpersonal and communication skills can lead to many general impacts that easily appear at school and in society.
Because communication is the key and root of social relations. The following are the impacts that commonly appear due to interpersonal communication problems:
1. Relationship Damage and Increased Potential for Conflict
Aggressive, defensive, or passive communication styles can trigger relationship tension and reduce the quality of interactions between individuals.
Wood (2015) in Interpersonal Communication: Everyday Encounters, explains that mismanaged communication often leads to escalating conflict and relational deterioration.
Consequently, relationships become less harmonious, misunderstandings increase, and the likelihood of recurrent conflict increases.
2. Decreased Trust and Emotional Safety
When messages are not delivered clearly, consistently, or honestly, the interlocutor tends to lose trust.
Adler, Rosenfeld, & Proctor, in Interplay: The Process of Interpersonal Communication, assert that “trust erodes quickly when communication is inconsistent or perceived as disrespectful” (Wood, 2015).
As a result, relationships become fragile, and subsequent interactions are more prone to tension.
3. Weakened Collaboration and Teamwork
Ineffective communication can disrupt coordination, slow down decision-making, and reduce group performance.
Beebe et al., (2016) state that ineffective interpersonal strategies reduce group cohesion and limit the achievement of shared goals.
The ultimate impact is seen in less solid teamwork and reduced member motivation to contribute.
4. Increased Stress and Emotional Burden
Differences in communication styles or misunderstandings often lead to emotional tension, anxiety, and frustration.
Floyd (2021) states that misinterpretations and unmet interpersonal expectations contribute significantly to emotional stress.
This affects an individual’s psychological state in both formal situations and everyday social interactions.
5. Hindered Problem-Solving and Decision-Making
Ineffective communication prevents information from being conveyed comprehensively, resulting in suboptimal decision-making quality.
Burgoon et al. (2021) wrote that communication breakdowns interfere with clarity, making problem-solving far less efficient.
As a result, the resulting solutions tend to be less than optimal and can even worsen the situation.
6. The Emergence of Withdrawal and Decreased Engagement
When someone feels unappreciated or frequently misunderstood, they tend to avoid interactions. In line with the views of Adler et al. (2018), negative communication can reduce willingness to participate and diminish interpersonal engagement.
This is reflected in reduced participation in academic settings, community settings, and daily activities.
e. General Solution to Solve Interpersonal Communication Problems
The points below are the offered solution to solve and prevent interpersonal Communication problems based on the theories from some experts:
1. Improving Assertive Communication Skills
Assertive communication allows individuals to express their needs, feelings, and opinions clearly without being aggressive.
This approach is effective in preventing conflict and reducing the potential for misunderstandings.
Wood (2015) in Interpersonal Communication: Everyday Encounters, stated that “assertive communication promotes mutual respect and reduces unnecessary relational tension” (p. 189).
By practicing assertiveness, relationships become more equal because neither party feels disempowered or ignored.
2. Strengthening Active Listening Skills
Active listening requires full attention, empathy, and appropriate responses. This strategy helps reduce message distortion and build trust in interpersonal relationships.
Adler et al. (2018) in Interplay: The Process of Interpersonal Communication, explained that effective listening is central to resolving misunderstandings and fostering relational connections (p. 171).
With this skill, both parties can understand each other’s intentions and needs more deeply.
3. Controlling Emotions Before Communicating
Many interpersonal tensions stem from poorly channeled emotions. Managing your tone, choosing the right moment to speak, or pausing before responding can prevent conflicts from escalating.
Floyd, (2021) noted in Interpersonal Communication that emotion regulation is essential for maintaining constructive dialogue and avoiding escalation (p. 204). By managing emotions, conversations can proceed more logically and productively.
4. Establishing Structured Communication Guidelines
In groups and communities, rules such as taking turns speaking, giving everyone equal opportunity, and avoiding blaming language can help prevent tension.
Beebe et al. (2016) in Interpersonal Communication: Relating to Others, stated that clear communication norms enhance cooperation and reduce interpersonal friction (p. 233). Mutually agreed-upon guidelines make interactions more orderly and fairly.
5. Developing Empathy and the Ability to See from Another’s Perspective
Empathy allows one to understand another’s position and feelings before reacting. Perspective-taking can also reduce negative judgments that can damage relationships.
Burgoon et al. (2021) stated that “empathic accuracy strengthens relational bonds and minimizes interpretive errors during interactions” (p. 121). With empathy, communication becomes warmer and more harmonious.
6. Providing Constructive Feedback
Good feedback focuses on behavior, not personality, so it doesn’t create a feeling of being attacked. This approach makes the other person more open to receiving input.
Adler et al. (2018) in their work asserted that constructive feedback supports learning and reduces defensiveness (p. 216).
Thus, communication becomes more effective and relationships are maintained.
7. Clarify Messages to Reduce Ambiguity
Many conflicts arise because messages are unclear or misinterpreted. Repeating the main point of the conversation or asking clarifying questions can prevent misinterpretation.
Wood (2015) emphasized that checking understanding is crucial to avoid unnecessary conflict driven by ambiguity (p. 146). This step ensures that the message is received correctly by both parties.
Brief Comparison
The interpersonal communication cases that occur in school and in society reveal clear similarities as well as distinct differences.
In both settings, communication problems arise due to contrasting interaction styles, limited openness, weak listening skills, and a lack of understanding of others’ perspectives.
At school, conflicts within study teams or issues related to keeping promises stem from dominant or passive communication styles and insufficient assertiveness.
This pattern mirrors situations in the community, where harsh reprimands during community service or misunderstandings in public queues occur because messages are delivered improperly and are received defensively.
The differences lie in the context and relational dynamics. In school, communication problems are closely tied to academic collaboration, differing learning strategies, and peer discipline, making the interactions more personal and emotionally influenced.
Meanwhile, communication issues in society involve broader social interactions shaped by generational gaps, cultural diversity, and social hierarchy, increasing the likelihood of conflicts escalating in public settings.
Despite these differences, both environments demonstrate that aggressive or passive communication consistently worsens situations, whereas assertive and respectful communication helps reduce tension and build mutual understanding.
The overall analysis shows that interpersonal communication skills play a crucial role in fostering harmony and positive relationships both in school and in society.
A lack of empathy, poor emotional regulation, unclear messages, and mismatched communication styles are the main causes of conflict, declining trust, weakened collaboration, and emotional strain in daily interactions.
The cases discussed illustrate that interpersonal problems often arise not from major issues but from simple misunderstandings and ineffective message delivery.
The proposed solutions such as practicing assertive communication, strengthening active listening, managing emotions before speaking, providing constructive feedback, and clarifying ambiguous messages, demonstrate that communication improvement can prevent misunderstandings and enhance the quality of relationships.
Ultimately, successful social interaction depends on an individual’s ability to balance personal needs with respect for others.
Therefore, developing strong interpersonal communication skills is essential not only for resolving conflicts but also for creating more inclusive, cooperative, and harmonious school and community environments.
Conclusion
The overall analysis reveals that interpersonal communication skills play a vital role in fostering harmony and positive relationships, both in school and in society.
A lack of empathy, poor emotional regulation, unclear messages, and mismatched communication styles are the main causes of conflict, declining trust, weakened collaboration, and emotional strain in daily interactions.
The cases discussed illustrate that interpersonal problems often arise not from major issues but from simple misunderstandings and ineffective message delivery.
The proposed solutions such as practicing assertive communication, strengthening active listening, managing emotions before speaking, providing constructive feedback, and clarifying ambiguous messages demonstrate that communication improvement can prevent misunderstandings and enhance the quality of relationships.
Ultimately, successful social interaction depends on an individual’s ability to balance personal needs with respect for others.
Therefore, developing strong interpersonal communication skills is essential not only for resolving conflicts but also for creating more inclusive, cooperative, and harmonious school and community environments.
Writers:
1. Rama Dhanis (2405246923)
2. Nurjannah (2405246911)
3. Karin Meilian (2405246927)
Student of English Education Program, Universitas Riau
Supervisor:
1. Dr. Jismulatif, M.Hum.
2. Dr. Dahnilsyah, S.S.
Editor: Siti Sajidah El-Zahra
Bahasa: Rahmat Al Kafi
References
Adler, R. B., Rosenfeld, L. B., Proctor, R. F., & Proctor, R. F. (2018). Interplay: The Process of Interpersonal Communication. Oxford University Press. https://books.google.co.id/books?id=Y2H9swEACAAJ
Beebe, S. A., Beebe, S. J., & Redmond, M. V. (2011). Interpersonal communication: Relating to others. Boston: Pearson Education.
Beebe, S. A., Beebe, S. J., & Redmond, M. V. (2016). Interpersonal Communication: Relating to Others. Pearson Education. https://books.google.co.id/books?id=5rR5CwAAQBAJ
Beenen, G., Fiori, M., Pichler, S., & Riggio, R. (2023). Interpersonal skills: individual, social, and technological implications. Frontiers in Psychology, 14, 1209508. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2023.1209508
Burgoon, J. K., Guerrero, L. K., & Manusov, V. (2021). Nonverbal Communication. Taylor & Francis. https://books.google.co.id/books?id=-X46EAAAQBAJ
Floyd, K. (2021). Interpersonal Communication. McGraw-Hill Education. https://books.google.co.id/books?id=go39xwEACAAJ
Manning, J. (2020). Interpersonal communication. In D. L. Merskin (Ed.). The SAGE international encyclopedia of mass media and society (online ed.; pp. 1-5). Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage.
Praveen, D. S. R. (2017). Interpersonal communication skills in present era by Dr SR. Royal. https://www.academia.edu/104944628/Interpersonal_communication_skills_in_present_era_by_Dr_SR?source=swp_share
Spitzberg, B. H., & Cupach, W. R. (2011). Interpersonal skills. The SAGE handbook of interpersonal communication, 4, 481-527.
Tsegaye, A. (2020). Factors affecting oral communication/exploring impacting factors of interpersonal communication. International Journal of English Literature and Culture, 8(3), 61-68. DOI: 10.14662/IJELC2020.040
Wood, J. T. (2015). Interpersonal Communication: Everyday Encounters. Cengage Learning. https://books.google.co.id/books?id=IInCBAAAQBAJ
⚡ Baca Lebih Cepat Artikel MMI di Ponsel Anda!
Ikuti Channel WhatsApp
Media Mahasiswa Indonesia (MMI):
KLIK DI SINI
